Toenail Fungus

Toenail fungus. Simple as that. I could turn that into a metaphor for being polished and pretty on the inside and broken and dirty on the inside, but it's not about that today. It's about a straight-out case of toenail fungus.

Ok. Fine. So, it's not that deep....and....it's not that simple either. :-) You know me better than that. I did want to get that out of the way though. If you are looking for something with a little more depth, I wanted to let you know up front that you won't be getting that here. It's more like some rambling...

What it is really about is how busy us moms can be and how that can lead to us not taking care of ourselves. Have I blogged about that before? I'm not sure and I don't have the time to check, so forgive me if this is a repeat  (tongue in cheek)....

I woke up this morning to a throbbing toe. Not that this is new to me, it's just that it usually occurs on the way to bed, not when I wake up. Maybe I was running around the house in my sleep. Who knows.... Anyway... I have a little issue with my big toe. fine. HAD a small issue with my big toe. IGNORED my small issue with my big toe. Now have a BIG painful issue with my big toe.

Again, I could start to go into how this 'little issue turning into a big one because I ignored it' problem can be applied to bigger life issues... but... not today...

Back to this morning... As I lay there with my throbbing toe, my mind got to thinking... Why haven't I had this taken care of? It hurts! The usual excuses came up. Time? Well, if I stayed off Facebook and Words with Friends for a day or two, I would probably 'bank' enough time to get to the doctor's office. Money? I finally have insurance again, and like the time (non) issue, if I cut a few things here and there, it should cover the copay. Babysitter? I would be a complete liar if I said I didn't have anyone to watch my kids. Out of everything, this is probably where I have the most support...Hmmmm...

What is it!?!? At the risk of sounding like I martyr, I think it's simply the fact that I'm so busy taking care of everyone else, that I don't even take the time (let alone even think about) to make a doctor's appointment. (I really hope I don't sound like a martyr, although it can be really easy to get sucked into that role - which is a whole 'nother blog in itself!) I think I just sound like a mom! If my issue is not affecting anyone else, I really have no motivation to get it taken care of. There is enough stuff that "matters" to take care of.

 I don't think it is abnormal , but at the same time I don't agree with this line of thinking. How do us moms get a new mindset? At what point do we think our needs are just as important as everyone else's? I should have a servant's heart, but at the same time I need to take care of the temple that is my body. Right?! Would I want my daughters to grow up and put themselves at the bottom of their own "to-do" list? If not, why would I be that kind of example? But then again, if my motivation is to be an example for my kids and not just to simply take care of myself, does that put me back in the same cycle?

Am I thinking too much about this?

Probably. Maybe at the end of the day the answer is that I really don't want to mess up my semi-annual professional pedicure. :-) Yeah. That's it.

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Talk to me!

Can you relate? Do you find yourself in the same dilemma? If not, what is your motivation? Is there anyone in your life that can use motivation to take care of themselves? If so, what can you do for them?

Personal Responsibilty

I’ve dedicated today to  getting the clothes organized (again!) and cleaning the house. While I’m trying to get this done, all of a sudden I think about a blog and how I have time to finally write one… funny how that works… maybe I should dedicate more time to cleaning the house…

When you have an ex that you are dealing with, a spouse that works different hours than the average 9 to 5, or any difficult person in your life (come on, I’m sure you can think of at least one!) it is really easy to start blaming and pointing fingers.  “I” did (or didn’t do) this because “they” did or said…  Sometimes it’s once in a while, and then sometimes it turns into a “belief” or way of life for us. You become a (self-perceived) victim of the circumstances that this person put you in. An excuse for our behavior.

Truth is, each one of us will stand in front of the Lord and give an account for how we lived our life. Alone. We will give an account of what we did with what HE gave us; time, finances, children, ministry, etc. We will be standing there alone, responsible for our actions and reactions to people and circumstances. There will be no one there to point fingers at (and thankfully, no one standing there pointing fingers at me!). No “buts” - just personal responsibility. God has given us free will, and along with that comes great responsibility.  

Side note: It is by faith in Jesus Christ that I am saved and do not fear this judgment.  Because I am a believer and follower of Jesus Christ, despite the account that I must give, I have been cleansed with the blood of Jesus and will be accepted by God as His own. Nothing I do can increase or decrease my chances of being accepted by God as long as I choose to believe that Jesus Christ is my savior.  Because I love the Lord, I long to hear the words , “Well done, my good and faithful student.”  Because I love the Lord for who HE IS and not what He does, I long to please Him – just as my own young children long to please me. This is whole new topic I’m going on, so I’m going to stop now and get back to my housecleaning…

Rev. 20:11-15: Judgment of the lost

I Cor. 3:10-23, II Cor. 5:10-11: Judgment of the saved

Matthew 25:23

His Time

I’m sitting here thinking about things that I need to work on. One of the dominant issues that I need to deal with is time management. I started thinking that I needed to be a better steward of my time. I needed to schedule my time for the week better. I need to prioritize what I decide to do with my time.

Then something clicked. Maybe I’m looking at this from the wrong perspective. I am not my own. I dedicated my life to Jesus Christ who paid the price of His life for me. Maybe I should be looking at it as HIS time, not MY time. How would I run my day differently if I thought of every minute as HIS time?

I’ll leave you with that thought as I continue to ponder it myself…